Tag Archives: relationships
For now, that’s us. And, the truth is, this earthly life was never meant to be perfect. There’ll be a lot of tests and there’ll be moments when we’d want to give up; to give up on others or the situation, which makes me realize that’d be us giving up on ourselves–on the servants HE wishes us to be.
EaRtHLiNgs. It may not be easy to be one, but Alhamdulillah, we’re here…still here with an opportunity to make the most of this life so we can successfully go back to our real home in the end, bi’idhnillah.
Smile, supplicate, and strive to keep the faith! 💗
the pause was…a change of state. a new chapter–or should i say, two chapters? a crazy adventure. a giving up to gain. a learning from scratch. a discovery and re-discovery of who i am and what it means to be beautifully interdependent. no mastery of lessons…yet…still going…still hopeful that i’ll get to my desired destination, in shaa ALLAH.
no more full-time work for me–save for wifeyhood and mommyhood (harhar). yep, i did get to find the courage to take that step forward. so, there…and the journey of this muslimah continues….
who cries for justice yet remains locked in the dark
who numbly prances to the tune of gunshots
whose loved ones’ end may never be known
who realizes that most questions will be left unanswered
to the sojourner
whose life is shattered by another who has ceased to be man
who forces a smile amidst the tears
who leaves home in search of serenity
who breaks down yet repeats to oneself that all is well, all is well
to the sojourner
who’s driven mad by meaningless orders
whose soul dies each time it takes a life
who remains wide awake though he is asleep
who struggles in moving forward to find his way back
to the sojourner
whose experiences drain me yet strengthen me
who teaches me how tough life in this world is
who reminds me of HIM and HIS Divine Will
who hopes, like me, for happiness in eternity
to the sojourner
who’s different yet the same as me…
you are far yet near, silent yet heard
be comforted that one day it’ll all be over
we are one in prayer, sufficed by One True Healer.
what you may consider as just being ‘friendly’
can in actuality be interpreted differently.
perhaps it’s the other’s fault to assume;
but how sure are you you didn’t give the devil some room?
you may think you’re speaking from the heart,
but you could be tearing a person, a couple, or a family, apart.
when the damage is done, “i didn’t mean to” is so easy to say,
but it shouldn’t have happened had you not let pride get in the way.
Check your intentions. Check your actions. Yes, it may not be easy,
but sincerity will always be a reflection of GOD-centered sensitivity.
Keep right and battle against yourself with all your might.
Day Four of this Blessed Month, and I’m re-learning so much.
Goal Tweaking. I’ve tweaked my Ramadan goals after realizing some are not actually doable for someone like me who’s just beginning to have a more regular relationship with Arabic (i.e, daily reading practice on my own). Reading is one thing–and I’d have to say I still get some letters mixed up and I am not even sure if I am pronouncing them correctly; understanding is another. Understanding. It’s this part that makes me frustrated with my situation at times. It’s a blessing to find translations for most but then there are some which I can’t find, and it honestly feels kind of pointless to utter a prayer I don’t even understand. It makes me appreciate the existence of someones-like-me-in-the-world who help me understand things better. Still, I’m happy I can find it in me to continue on my own, Alhamdulillah…and continue throughout this month and beyond, I will, in shaa Allah.
Hibernating. Deactivating my Facebook account and going online on Viber only when necessary has helped me work on some of my goals. It’s funny how the first few days before Ramadan turned out to be tougher than expected–going offline yet suddenly getting a surge of calls and SMS from them. Brotherly? It makes me realize that this hijab does not exactly prevent sisters much from getting attention when the people involved do not fully understand and respect the meaning of hijab. I keep forgetting I’m in a predominantly non-Muslim community. It also reminds me that it probably isn’t always true that men have a tougher time avoiding fitna because seriously, men naturally do the courting (or hunting, if you will) and women are often left with having to deal with what these men do. A training on assertiveness for me as well. And just to be safe, I’m sticking to the same goal I had last year: to not just protect my intentions but also help others keep the right intentions through lesser interactions. In shaa ALLAH.
Fasting. Aside from fasting from online presence and food & water this Ramadan, I am trying my best to fast from negativity. A month of great training for the soul, mashaAllah. Considering Satan and all his allies are chained this month, any negativity could only come from our own selves–from our evil-commanding souls. And, I know it may take some time for me to train myself to respond–not react–to people who constantly test me, but with HIM, I will make it. In shaa ALLAH.
Feasting. It’s a month of not just fasting, really. It’s a month to feast on performing prayers, supplicating, remembering ALLAH, Qur’an reading, increasing knowledge, giving back to the community–especially to the less fortunate, and renewing ties with family and friends. It’s a month to give and ask forgiveness, increase and protect our sincerity, and do all things with excellence–all for The Most Merciful’s sake. It’s indeed a month to feast on all the blessings HE has made available around and within us…and for us to become better servants, in shaa ALLAH.
When I think of it, this year’s main theme for me is all about patience–patience to pursue my goals, patience to deal with others the best way I can, patience to perform my religious duties the best way possible, and patience to see life and everything & everyone in it always as a blessing. Difficult, you think? Maybe…but with ALLAH, nothing is indeed impossible.